Monday, January 16, 2012
Dearest darling Georgina,
I can't remember a time before you were in our life. In just three short months you have changed us completely and I can't imagine being without you. Not for a moment, a minute, a heartbeat.
I remember the first time I held you. You were lifted above my head, howling and purple, and placed on my chest. I didn't know what to say. After 34 hours of labour I was tired, emotional, scared, terrified, relieved, ecstatic... But you looked directly into my eyes and that look conveyed everything that needed to be said. Love, devotion, happiness. It was just the three of us. Together.
It seems like only yesterday we brought you home from the hospital. I remember that day so well, even though every day since seems to be a blur. We drove you home from the hospital - I sat in the back of the car because I couldn't bear to be apart from you. We brought you into the house and placed you - asleep in your capsule - in the middle of the lounge room floor. We all sat around you, silent, admiring your beautiful little face. I remember thinking "I can't believe they let me leave hospital with you. Don't they know I have no idea what I am doing?" But together we have muddled through and we are both still okay. We must be doing something right.
Little Birdie, we love you so much. That cheeky grin, that happy disposition. You do something new every day. At the moment you are trying to pull yourself up to sit. You are imitating our words and rolling over. Already my tiny baby girl is growing up too fast. I cling to these precious moments of wonder and newness, knowing all too soon they will be distant memories.
We so longed for a baby and you certainly took your time coming to join our family. It was worth the wait, the pain, the heartache. Through the good times and bad, having you here has made me a better person. I couldn't have imagined how it feels being a mummy: it's almost as if every feeling I have had until now is magnified tenfold. I feel so much more - happiness is happier, sadness is unbearable. I'd do anything to protect you and my love for you is fierce. Now I appreciate fully what it means to love - because of you I love your Daddy more, my friends and family more and you. Always you.
Happy three months, my darling little girl.